Scared to start counselling?

Scared to start therapy?

The thought of starting therapy can feel daunting and scary. Maybe you have only ever seen therapy in films or on TV and developed an idea from that what therapy looks like. Maybe you have a vision of being laid down on a sofa with your eyes closed a little bit like Sigmund Freud's Psychodynamic model of therapy. Or maybe you think it's going to be a room sat across from someone who just nods, with minimal communication, parroting back what you have said?

Perhaps you perceive therapy as a place where you will immediately get the answers and it is the counsellor who has all the answers for you?

Or maybe you feel scared that you may be judged or assessed?

Well, even though some of the above may be true in some types of therapy, a lot of theories have adapted and changed over time. It would also be helpful when looking for a therapist that you have an idea of their area of training and what they have experience in. Are they purely CBT which is a rigid and structured modality focusing on one area only. Maybe they are purely Person Centred providing a space with certain conditions to enable independence and growth. Are they relational or integrative and use a range of modalities to suit each individual? How do they work with clients to support their needs, do they offer worksheets and tools to take away?

The above all sounds well and good but the next question might be, how do I find the right therapist for me?

Start by searching for a counsellor on recognised professional organisations like the BACP or Counselling Directory. If you find a therapist through their website always check they are part of an ethical professional body.

Read through descriptions, fee's and even availability, do they offer days and times that fit for you? Do they offer in person or online? Think about what it is you need.

You can send a message to find out more, or give them a call - sometimes an initial chat can be really helpful to answer any questions you have lingering.

Once you have found someone you feel may be the right one, don't be scared if you have a first session and change your mind. You could even talk about it in the session, or go away and have a think- what was it that didn't quite work? Not every counsellor is going to be the right one for you, and that's ok! There are many reasons that this happens and it's just like in life in general we don't always have to connect to people, however it is worth exploring what this could be. For example, it takes time to build trust and to feel comfortable to share some of your most sensitive information and sometimes we maybe are just not ready for that yet.

When therapy feels right, the right time, the right place then it works well, although it's never going to be easy starting a journey like this, but with the right support hopefully it feels just that bit easier.

Just as we come to the end I wanted to share this little poem with you about the layers on the counselling journey

Peeling back layers, one by one,

Facing shadows, embracing the sun,

In the mirror of trust, reflections arise,

With every tear, we learn to be wise.

If you do want to find out more about me head over to my about me section :)